N.B.: The Challenge:
Category: Humour (angst only allowed if necessary to plot, yes plot is allowed) / First Time
Preferred Pairing: Malcolm/Trip
Line you must use: "Oh my head -- WTF! There's a naked man in my bed!" as either said aloud or thought by Trip (this is who I think of when I read this line)
Story Requirements (use as many or as few as you like) : At least one sex scene, more is definitely better but not compulsory
H/c allowed but only if it doesn't interfere with the required sex scene
Lots of alcohol
Trip and Malcolm being set up by someone/s to end up in bed together as a joke
Karaoke with someone singing 'Sex Bomb' by Tom Jones (optional, I heard this song when I was in the book store buying Enterprise:By the Book and haven't been able to get it out of my head since :)
Hangovers from hell
I have never heard the song “Sex Bomb,” but the song, “I Touch Myself” lent itself rather nicely, so I went with that instead. ~RB
It was debatable who the most inebriated person at the party was. Right now, Malcolm would place his money on one Trip Tucker, though he realised that he was probably a close second. It was, however, Trip, not he, who had rigged the sound system in the mess hall to act as a glorified karoke machine, cutting out the lead vocals in the song he was currently singing.
Trip’s response was to pull him in for another kiss and then pull him out the door. Malcolm’s quarters were closest, so that’s where they ended up. Though not until after several stops to shove one another against a bulkhead, kissing frantically and pawing at cloth-covered erections.
It proved to be a bad idea. Intent on the fly of Malcolm’s trousers, Trip tried to take a step forward as the man backed up, only to trip on the fabric pooled at his feet. The tall blond crashed into the shorter brunet, sending them both to the floor.
Trip used his new, horizontal position to advantage by kicking off his shoes and then discarding his pants once and for all. Still using the song to communicate his desire to Malcolm, he sang, “I get down on my knees, I’d do anythin’ for you,” and clambered up onto all fours. He presented his backside to Malcolm invitingly, spreading his legs as far as he could.
He crawled in between Trip’s legs, dropping his pants and boxers. He was impatient, Trip was impatient, and he was too drunk to worry much, so Malcolm simply greased up his eager cock and buried himself in the warm, willing body in front of him.
Recalling the beat of the music, the two managed to settle into a relatively consistent rhythm of thrust and counter-thrust. Trip moaned in long, wordless exhalations. The noise Trip made excited Malcolm tremendously, and he came, biting down on Trip’s shoulder as he did so.
The pleasure combined with the pain, as well as the sensation of Malcolm pumping his seed into him, triggered Trip’s own orgasm. They stayed locked together for a few quiet moments after that before Malcolm pulled out and away from Trip. He finished divesting himself of his, by now, quite askew clothing. Trip’s shirt was the next to go, and he pulled the now naked engineer up onto the bed with him.
Cocooning themselves in the blankets and each other’s arms, the pair let the warmth and post-coital lethargy overtake them, slipping off to sleep.
“I love myself, I want you to love me. When I feel down, I want you above me. I search myself, I want you to find me. I forget myself, I want you to remind me.”
The gin in the tonic was that he was singing the vintage song with drunken single-mindedness to none other than Malcolm Reed. For his part, Malcolm was simply sitting in his chair, watching the commander wiggle and gyrate seductively in front of him with a expression partway between stunned and lustful.
“I don’t want anybody else. When I think about you, I touch myself. Oh, I don’t want anybody else. oh, no. oh, no. oh, no.”
Trip stroked himself through the fabric of his rapidly tightening blue jeans, garnering catcalls from a number of the other drunken officers filling the mess. Malcolm’s tongue flicked out to wet his lips and got stuck partway out.
“You’re the one who makes me come runnin’. You’re the sun who makes me shine. When you’re around I’m always laughin’. I wanna make you mine.”
The temperature in the room was rising, Malcolm felt sure. Or maybe it was just Trip.
“I close my eyes and see you before me. Think I would die if you were to ignore me. A fool could see j’st how much I adore you. I get down on my knees, I’d do anythin’ for you.”
Trip fell to his knees in front of Malcolm, sliding his hands up the lieutenant’s thighs. His thumbs caressed the sensitive insides, and Malcolm started to pant, eyes dilating hugely.
“I don’t want anybody else. When I think about you, I touch myself. Oh, I don’t want anybody else.”
The alcohol, music, and Trip were all combining to cause Malcolm to become the most utterly shameless man in the galaxy. He slid out of his chair and into Trip’s lap.
“I love myself, I want you to love me. When I feel down, I want you above me. I search myself, I want you to find me. I forget myself, I want you to remind me.”
Their faces were mere centimetres apart. The rest of the room had ceased to exist. Trip continued to croon softly to Malcolm, and the two were rocking together in time with the music pounding around them.
“I don’t want anybody else. When I think about you, I touch myself. Oh, I don’t want anybody else...”
The music faded away, and the catcalls became audible. Malcolm hauled Trip to his feet and, after planting a rough, needy kiss on the man’s lips, said, “Let’s get out of here.”
Safely behind closed doors, they did their best to remove the cloth covering them. Drunk as they were, they were both quite clumsy. Trip only got half of Malcolm’s shirt unbuttoned before giving up on the effort and turning his attention to the man’s pants. Meanwhile, Malcolm had been busy unzipping Trip’s jeans and had the offending legwear down around his ankles. Trip’s underwear quickly joined his pants, and Malcolm took a step back to survey his handiwork.
Malcolm didn’t need to be told twice. He reached frantically for the lube in his dresser drawer, almost pulling the innocent piece of furniture down on top of himself in the process. The dresser stayed upright, and Malcolm brandished the tube of lubricant triumphantly.
Said naked man grumbled and rolled over to face him, and Trip found himself staring into the piercing blue eyes of one Malcolm Reed.
“It not your bed, Yank. Do me a favour and keep your voice down. My head feels like it’s being split in two.”
“Malcolm? How... Why... Oh. Never mind.” Images from the night before began to filter through his hungover brain, and he stopped his line of questioning. “You’re ... you’re not angry with me, are you?”
“Angry? Why would I be angry?” Malcolm asked, brow furrowed in a combination of pain and confusion.
“Well... You know...”
“No, I’m afraid I don’t.”
“Public humiliation. Sexual harassment. You know.”
“As I recall events, Commander,” he replied with a lopsided grin, “I’m the one who fucked you. I’d hardly call that sexual harassment. Anyway, everyone in the hall was pissed, plenty of embarrassing acts and faulty memories to go around. At least our, um, more intimate acts were performed behind a locked door.”
“You’re bein’ awful calm about this, Malcolm.”
“It could have something to do with being granted my fondest wish this morning when I awoke.” He pulled Trip to him, pressing the lengths of their bodies together. “Either that or it’s my hangover. Hysterics and hangovers don’t mix well, I’ve found.”
“Never stopped you from gettin’ angry with me before.”
“True.” He kissed the tip of Trip’s nose. “Now, there is something I’d like to know.”
“Yeah?”
“Whatever possessed you to sing that song?”
“Jonathan Archer.”
“I beg your pardon?”
“He dared me to do it. Said he didn’t think I had the guts.”
“When was this?”
“Oh, that last time we got up t’ get drinks for ev’rybody.”
“Just before the third sheet was released to the wind, in other words.”
“J’st about.”
Malcolm rubbed aimlessly at the bridge of his nose, then reached out to play with Trip’s spiky hair. “Do you suppose he had any idea what would happen?”
“I don’t rightly know. I think he said somethin’ about needing to be entertained. He mighta meant watchin’ me make a fool of myself, but I s’ppose he coulda meant watchin’ us go at each other.”
“’Go at each other?’ So romantic, Trip,” said Malcolm sarcastically.
Trip pursed his lips and gave Malcolm a mildly irritated look. “You call our little drunken orgy last night romantic?”
“Guess not. Want to start over?”
“Start over?”
“Yes. More ... romantic this time.” Malcolm stretched languidly next to Trip, a wicked smile spreading across his face. “Breakfast in bed, and then we can go from there.”
“I like the sound of that. Only...”
“Only?” Malcolm was beginning to look apprehensive.
“Only, can we go to Sickbay first? Get somethin’ for our hangovers?” Trip grinned at Malcolm and was rewarded with an answering smile and chuckle.
“Sure, Trip. After all, I’d do anythin’ for you.”
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